Getting to Jordan

September 28, From Tom:  Getting to Jordan
After the last hectic days and nights, clearing out stuff and preparing the house, and giving farewell talks in our wonderful 8th Ward, we were exhausted. Ronna suggested we stay in a local hotel so we would be out of the house and get a good nights sleep. As it turned out we worked until about 2 AM and had to get up at 5: 45 AM for Lindee to drive us. Cami and Lindee worked with us till the wee hours; bless their hearts.

In the morning we were so frantic getting out on time that I ( Tom) left a large bin on the curb of the hotel. It had some of Ronna's precious things in it, so we got off to a rocky start. We were very concerned because of all the warnings: No more than 50 lbs per bag, only 3 months supply of medicine, only so much money. We were either at or slightly above on all of them so we thought we'd get zinged. No so! We sailed right through. We must have weighed our bags 7-8 times each to make sure we were under 50 lbs. I also felt like a smuggler with all my medications.

It was hard giving the last good byes to Lindee. We knew it would be hard on her and Addy and Cade.  We gratefully had earlier good byes to the others so it spread out the pain.

It was a two hour flight to Chicago and then a 7 hour layover. Ronna wanted to take a taxi and go sight seeing. I could see us stuck in rush hour traffic. So I made last calls to friends and family and Ronna tried to nap.

As soon as we stepped on Royal Jordanian Airlines we knew we were in a different culture. The flight attendants were dressed in gorgeous gowns, red with embroidery. The flight was only half full so we had a bit more space to stretch out-- that's a stretch :D

We flew nearly over Iceland, then Ireland, England, Germany Austria then Greece and the Mediterranean. I was wondering how they would enter Jordan, considering Syria's conflict and the threat of missiles.

There was an interesting moment in the flight as we were approaching Israel on the east side of the Mediterranean. On the TV/movie screens the airline had a map with a graphic showing where we were at that time. I guess it was in response to "When are we going to get there?". Anyway, the graphic showed the plane flying east, BETWEEN SYRIA, EGYPT and IRAQ. Zingo!! Are we crazy?? It just kind of got me at that moment. Then I looked down and saw Israel, then the Dead Sea, then mountain, then a bleak desert, then we banked and started coming down into that desert and we landed. Here we are, bleaker than Nevada.

The Amman Airport is gorgeous, only a few months old, named Queen Alia International after the 3rd wife of King Hussein. Again, we thought we'd have trouble getting through customs with the stash of medicines ( boxes and bags of it) and $20k in cash. So the big guy at the customs gate looks at me and says, "Hey man, are you from Chicago?" I said, " Sure am man!" So he gave me a high five and ushered me through. Welcome to Jordanian hospitality.

Brent and Margaret were there to greet us and whisked us off to their apartment where we had a great meal, a little orientation and an early sleep. Gratefully.

The next day we went for a phone card for my iPhone, a GPS to find our way around and started discussions with "George" who was going to arrange for a car. He turned out to be a bad deal. We went to a Safeway, of all places,  to get some supplies and drove off to Madaba to meet our landlady and her family and get situated. We'll describe the city and driving later, but it was a cultural shock.

Essentially, you can't read anything, understand anything, figure out where you are, recognize anything that is familiar. Cars swerving left and right, no lines on the roads, nobody stopping for signals, big white mansions and buildings next to shabby Gypsy tents in little villages. People in all sorts of dress: burqas, half burqas, coats with scarves, normal western outfits, men with red bandanas wrapped around their heads, sheiks with headdresses. The whole assortment, and it's all normal here.
Our home is owned by Mariam, sister of Nasri. They are classy and charming. They have a servant/helper from Sri Lanka named Lanni who giggles and smiles and takes care of things. Sewar is the daughter, about 28 and single. She is very bright and fluent in English. Mariam taught Arabic in school for about 40 years. Nasri is a vice president and soon to be Provost at AUM and Sewar works for Save the Children. Here are some shots of the home.

The top is the view from our front door. The lower one is Tom's office, converted from Dining Room.

View west from our front entry

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Sept 26-From Tom: Preparing to Go
When Brent Strong asked if we would like to come and work at the American University of Madaba, I seriously thought that Ronna would look at me and say "H--- no!!" I had asked her if she would like to visit Jerusalem and she said it was too dangerous. So I was expecting a rejection. When I explained the request she said she thought it would be interesting, considering the historical, religious, cultural, educational interest and challenges. We thought about it for about a week, seeking confirmation in our own way. Both of us felt very peaceful about it. And what's more, miracles started happening.

We still needed to rent our house to cover ongoing costs. Matt and Jen Holste, a wonderful family in our ward needed a home to rent to stay in the ward. Matt worked for me and was very talented at fixing  things and we knew they both would care for the house. My office offered to pay in advance for having me remain as a consultant to them for the year. Little did we know that we would need just that amount to get set up in Jordan. AUM was going to pay me, but it was about 1/3 of what I was making and we needed to cover the difference. It was happening.

When I announced our decision in the City Council, some had tears in their eyes and they gave me an ovation. The headline in the Herald Journal the next day read " PEACE MISSION". It was beautifully written about how Ronna and I were going to teach in Jordan and that somehow that might contribute to peace in a troubled land.

There were so many people that expressed support, hope, love and well wishes it was incredible. I had three people approach me in a two hour period saying they were praying for us. I did not know these people. I had many calls and emails also giving supportive messages. Many looked at us like they thought it would be the last time they saw us. Obviously, it all sounded crazy considering the horrible conflict going on in neighboring Syria plus Iraq and Egypt, all neighboring countries. Yet we felt a peaceful feeling about Jordan. I described it as a "lillypad of tranquility within a sea of insanity". It has proven to be true.

When I started looking to give away instead of getting, it caused a significant change in me, personally. For example, we had about 6,500 old sets of drawings in our basement archive. I was almost paralyzed trying to figure out what to do. This was our work for over 33 years. It included most of the work done in Cache Valley for a significant period of time. It was hard to consider throwing it out, but I needed to empty the basement. I sometimes would walk back and forth going from one rack to another.

Then I started grouping them into what we would take to the Salt Lake Archive,  those I would take to past clients and some files that needed to be shredded. As I took many of the drawing sets to past clients it was a "closure" that allowed me to move on. I believe I delivered hundreds of sets; some were to small clients with a single project like Dr. Jon Landeen and some were hundreds going to IHC or the LDS Church. These were all wonderful, healing experiences. Instead of looking to get projects, I was letting go, giving things back. I think it was necessary for me, even though it took weeks to accomplish.

The bigger effort was clearing our house!!!

The most underrated phrase is, " we'll just move it to storage"
Ya, right! Just move 43 years of life to a small box with a door. Both Ronna and I can't get rid of stuff easily, and we both think the problem is caused by the other person. We are both in a big case of denial.  We also said it would be easy once Chandi and Geoff moved their stuff. Right!! We kept finding new boxes marked "Ronna to sort" or "Tom's memorabilia" or "Urgent papers" dated 1972. Boxes of Sunday School Lessons, yarn for future crafts, photos, letters from someone, birthday cards, lesson manuals, clothes that don't fit, wires for technology we don't have, etc. This was good for us to be forced to face it. We had marvelous help from Chandi and Geoff, Lindee and Justin, Cori and Johnny and Cami. Each went way beyond expectations in getting the job done. Lots of stuff was thrown away and given away but a lot is still waiting for us to deal with it when we come back. Maybe that will delay our return.

Now that we are here in Jordan, having only brought two suitcases each, we are learning to live lightly. Sure we miss some of the stuff, but we are focussing on just a few things, our learning, preparing and teaching. I left behind not only "stuff" but connections and responsibilities with church, Architectural Nexus, Rotary, Cache Valley Center for the Arts, Downtown Alliance, Logan City Council, Envision Utah and a number of other committees. It was enjoyable but starting to become too much. Ronna and I miss the family, friends and especially our grandkids. We now are focussing on: trying to figure out how to understand people who have only a tiny ability in English, finding places when there are no addresses and no one to advise us, getting connected on our phones and internet when neither of us knows what to do, teaching in a foreign university when neither of us has the remotest idea what we are doing, cooking strange foods with water that you need to purify, using toilets in ways that were unknown to us, driving on streets where two lanes accommodates three or four lanes of honking drivers, hearing wild packs of dogs rule the neighborhoods at night and having in the back of our mind the fact that the cruelest conflict in the world is less than 100 miles away. Yes, we have something on our mind. But it is refreshing.

This is the Holy Land, truly. Moses came through here and had visions here. John the Baptist prepared here, taught here and was martyred here, Jesus taught, did miracles and was baptized just a few miles away. Assyrians, Babylonians, Greeks, Israelites, Romans, Byzantines, Ottomans, Alexander, Suleiman, the British and the Arabs all fought and controlled this land. This is the birthplace and the crossroads. It is desolate, haunting, mystical. The people have deep and complex roots.

We have so far heard of unimaginable atrocities next door in Syria and Iraq and we have been the recipients of the deepest generosity and kindness here in our neighborhood. What a contrast. We have much yet to learn.

Sept 22, 2013--Tom: The Saga Begins: Here we are, living in Madaba, Jordan. Three months ago I didn't know where this place was or anything about it. Now, it will be our home for at least a year. How in the world did we get here?

In mid-June, 2013, only 3 months ago, I got a text message from Brent Strong, Ronna's cousin with the message, "Help in Jordan!!". I thought he meant South Jordan Utah. After a few tries, I went through the LDS Church Charities and got a direct call.

Brent explained that he was doing service work as a humanitarian missionary in Jordan. ( Yes, between Syria and Iraq) He and Margaret had taken the place of Bobbi and Chris Coray who had been called to serve in Syria and were having an incredible time until the Syrian conflict became too severe. They were told to get out of Syria and told to report to Jordan. Apparently, they made the connection with the American University of Madaba (AUM), about 25 miles southwest of Amman and served in Madaba, with Bobbi doing humanitarian service and Chris helping with accreditation and teaching.

Brent stated that AUM wanted to develop an Architecture Department under the College of Art and Design and wondered if I knew anyone that would like to come and help. I stated that I didn't work in those circles but would be glad to assist. He then asked if I would be interested. I said that was way over my head; I was not qualified. He suggested that I send him my resume. I sent a resume and the material that I used to get elected to Logan City Council. ( You know about resumes; how they make everyone look like they can do anything.) We also sent one on Ronna's qualifications.

The response we received was that they wanted both Ronna and I to come. We were 'just who they were looking for'. Ronna, of course, had a Master's in Latin Pedagogy and had taught English at USU. I had 43 years "on the street" practicing architecture and had started my own firm from scratch. It had become a major firm in the region, not through my skill, but by building a team of talented people. Apparently they wanted someone who could reach out and connect. I told them I hadn't done a set of working drawings and didn't work on CAD. They wanted someone who could recruit, connect, get accredited and maybe teach something, anything.

After checking Jordan out: safety, politics, health, cost of living, travel, driving, climate and how they treated a 6'-2" outspoken, headstrong woman from California, we accepted the offer as a professional position. We were not missionaries for the church. I coined the phrase that were "a Mormon couple, teaching in a Catholic University in the middle of a Muslim nation overlooking the Palestinian section of Jerusalem". It seemed simple enough. The saga began. Yikes!! Little did I know what we were signing up for.